This is part of a series of stories that I wrote a few years ago, to be displayed in my local library. It was the perspectives of a group of people who had all loved a woman called Alicia Ross, and were collating stories and memories about her, together in a book.
It started with her husband Theo remembering the moment that she shared how she truly felt for him, before their wedding.
Nobody knows about his secret smile. Nobody but me, as it’s only for me. It’s not the usual half smirk, or the lustful grin he used to direct at any attractive woman that crossed his path. It’s something dazzling, sacred and bright which always lifts my mood. His smile brings me peace, and saves me from losing myself in the depths of grief, after losing so many people that I love. He is what I need, after all the ups and downs of my professional life, he is my rock. When I’m with him, I don’t worry as much. I just…she looks up and meets my gaze, a smile breaking over her face as she pauses in her scribbling. “What are you writing?” she’s always writing random thoughts, or conversations down in the black leather book, her dad gave her.
“I’m just trying to work on my vows. I don’t want them to be too cheesy.” She hands them over, so that I can look. I can’t quite believe that she feels so much for me, even the idea that someone like wants her wants to be with me, is constantly amazing for me. The insecurities date from losing my parents and are the reason that I have been running from town to town even since, until I met her. She’s always been the one that I count on, the first person since mom and dad that I really thought of, as being home. She smiles again “Are they okay?” I can see the nervousness dancing through her eyes despite the relative light tone. I don’t respond verbally, but hope that the kiss I lay on her lips, will tell her how I feel instead.
Musings of a thirtysomething woman 